


The Beat of My Heart

by RavenSnowStar94



Category: Throne of Glass Series - Sarah J. Maas
Genre: Alternate Universe - Boxing, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Developing Friendships, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-07
Updated: 2019-08-08
Packaged: 2019-08-20 00:41:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 8
Words: 19,743
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16545494
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RavenSnowStar94/pseuds/RavenSnowStar94
Summary: There was something worth fighting for.Elide was sure of that, even if coming from a abusive home she still saw the light in all the darkness around her. But what she never thought is that a person could be worth fighting for.And then she met Lorcan Salvaterre, and he was worth everything.





	1. Strangers

 

> _Said that we're not lovers, we're just strangers_
> 
> _With the same damn hunger_
> 
> _To be touched, to be loved, to feel anything at all_

  


“Elide, when do you need to go?” Asked Manon, her guitar inside of the car, looking at her roommate and wondering what she was going to do.

“Well, in ten seconds…” Elide checked her purse before locking the door of their little single floor house, realizing she needed to buy a new wallet. Hers was a mess, the compartiment where she usually puts coins in had a huge whole in it, so it was going to be impossible to use it. And where she puts her cards and ID, was of course, ripped. “Can you give me a ride to the subway station?”

“Where's the new place you're working at, by the way?” Manon waved at Elide to come inside the car as the engines started off with a big bang. Manon liked her used cars, meaning she liked the ones that, the more noise they did, the better. Elide tried to understand, but it was impossible to understand the mind of her roomate and only friend.

“It's at the Palladium Stadium.” Putting her seatbelt across her chest turned out to be a struggle because the material of the belt was almost deteriorating. “It will help me a lot if you leave me at the Denver Station.”

“Nonsense, my rehearsal is ten minutes from the Stadium, I can give you a ride there today.”

“Thanks, Manon.” She felt a little bad about making her roommate drive more time and thus spending more gas with her, but one thing she learned about Manon is that when she says something is because she wants to say it. If she says she will go buy you ice cream, she wants to go buy you ice cream. Elide liked Manon's personality and both of them had many things in common. They both came from unsettling backgrounds and worked a lot to get out of it, never stopping believing that they deserved more than what their families set for them.

“So, when it's your show? I would really love to meet your new band.”

“Well, it's next week. But you can meet my band anytime, for you information, they are strange and unsociable. That's why you weren't able to find them last time we were at the Glass Castle.”

Glass Castle was where Manon, and most of people from the region, seemed to go have some fun and dance through the whole night. It was owned by one of the richest family from the country, the Havilliards.

“Don't say those things about your friends...They have to endure a lot too. Like your charming personality.”

Manon laughed. And the driving seemed peaceful, until Elide got a text on her cell phone saying that today, even if it was her first day, she would be working until late because of a match.

“What happened?” Manon noticing Elide’s expression through the rear-mirror asked.

“First day and I have to work until late.” Elide groaned and thought about her feet. Even if it was fine most of the time, if she spent a long time standing up or doing physical work she would start to limp. “I need to buy some painkiller after work. It's going to be tough, I guess.”

They both didn’t have secrets anymore. Not after meeting one year ago during the worst part of their lives, during the time where trusting someone seemed unimaginable and relying in someone, even farthest from their reality. Because of an accident Elide suffered as a child, her ankle got messed up and, after not being taken care of, it got worse. Manon sometimes wondered if there was more to the story that Elide wasn’t telling her, but she chose to let it go for the meantime.

“Don't overdo yourself at work, Elide.” She simply advised.

“Don't worry, they said that I will be mostly dealing with the storage records so that means math and sitting down, probably.”

“Ok, if anything happens...just text or call me “

They arrived at the Stadium. Its walls were a dark blue, almost navy and the pilasters holding the roof where made of something metallic. Elide wasn’t sure how come the Stadium could hold thousands of people, because it looked smaller from outside, nevertheless it was standing strong for almost twenty years, so the foundation had to be good.

“See you later, Manon. Thanks for the ride.” Giving her roomate a lateral one-arm hug before exiting the old car, Elide knew that she was going to have a hard time, but wasn't going to let it show, she knew she could prevail.

“Right. Have a good first day.”

Elide closed the door right before Manon got out of the entrance, her tires making a whirring noise. For a quick second, Elide was embarrassed, but then she put her chin high and stepped one foot on her new routine.

 

*******

 

The guy that hired her forgot to tell her that she would be helping the cleaning staff on busy days. And coincidentally, her first day at her new job was a busy one.

Apparently, there would be happening a boxer match that day. Two star fighters against each other to raise some money to some cause, she thought it should be cancer or mental illnesses. Her brain started to have a fit after the tenth toilet she cleaned.

After lunch, she got busy with the storage records, thank God she had another employee to help her. Chaol Westfall was the day time manager and also married to a beautiful girl named Yrene. Chaol talked a lot about her during the lunch they shared, and Yrene learned that he met Yrene after he got discharged from the army because of an accident that lended him at a wheelchair for many months.

“I thought I would never walk again but then Yrene came. Like a warrior to battle my disability…” he told her in the middle of a salad. “I have to walk with a cane nowadays but it's better than to be stuck in a chair.”

“It is indeed.” She kept to herself mostly. Elide liked Chaol because of his openness and friendly manner, but she wasn't ready to pour out her heart like him.

They worked side by side at the storage, and while she organized the files,he counted the boxes around them. Silently and always with easiness.

When the clock reached 5 o'clock, Chaol gathered his wallet and cell phone and went to his house. He gave many apologies to Elide about leaving earlier than her, but their bosses would kill him if they find their “disabled” employee working extra hours. Chaol said they were very strict with him because they were afraid he would sue them for anything.

“I should sue them for this horrible uniform.” He said, before disappearing through the door and leaving Elide alone at the slightly bright storage.

She could hear the faint sounds of people inside the stadium, the microphones going up while a narrator said something that she didn't paid attention. The vibration of the floor because of the sound and the people, probably energized by the fight, made Elide happy to be around so many lively people. Even if they were there to watch people hitting each other.

She turned around when the door to the storage opened up, revealing a tall and long haired man coming inside. He didn't seem to notice her, in her defense she wasn't hiding, but there were columns of boxes hiding her from his line of vision.

He looked around as if expecting to find someone and then his husky voice made her put the pencil she was holding above the nearest box.

“Chaol, man, are you there?” The man came closer to where Elide was concealed and his face turned to a strange kind of surprised expression. “You're not Chaol.”

His eyes seemed to focus on her clothes and then he looked at her face. He was handsome, Elide thought.

“Chaol was sent away?” The man asked almost angrily.

“Oh, no. He went home for the day.” She extended her hand towards him, only now seeing his plaid shirt and leather boots. “I'm the new assistant here at the storage staff, Elide Lochan.”

He pressed his unexpected calloused hands politely, but without a smile.

“Lorcan Salvaterre, just retired from my work, I guess.”

“Congratulations? What kind of job did you have?” Without meaning to intrude in his life, but also curious about his answer.

“Boxing. I wanted to tell the news to Chaol, he kept nagging me for years that I should drop out of this world and I never heard him...now he will say “I told you so” with his annoying happy voice.”

“Well, boxing is kind of dangerous.”

“I knew that when I signed up.” He said harshly, putting an end to their conversation.

Elide turned to look at the logs she was filling before he walked in but her focus was on why he was still there even when she already turned away.

“Sorry about...well, have a nice evening.” Lorcan Salvaterre turned and practically fled the storage, only leaving the memory of his pained face behind.

 

*******

 

When Elide got off her first day at her new work, she had all the intentions of going back home and take a hot shower before letting herself go on her bed to rest her mind and body. But her foot seemed to be temperamental and didn't let her move. She thought about calling Manon, but she didn't want to rely too much on her roommate.

“It's late.”

Elide almost had a heart attack when hearing a voice coming out of the dark corridor at the left side of the stadium. She even had her pepper spray ready on hand.

“Thanks for the scare.”

“I didn't mean that.” Lorcan said raising both of his hands in defeat. “I was hiding.”

“That or you are a creep.”

He chuckled and didn't make any movement towards her. Wise move, she was still on alert.

“Promise, not a creep. Just having the need of some peace and quiet.”

“Are you one of the boxers that was going to fight today?” She said, already putting her spray inside her purse.

“Yes, but after an emotional speech about my retirement, people forgot I was supposed to fight.”

“Right...look, I need to go home now.”

“Ok.”

Before she could start her walk to the subway station, she turned around almost sighing, feeling bad for leaving him alone, even if they didn’t know each other.

“Are you friends with Chaol?”

Maybe asking him that would prove that he was a good or a bad guy, no one that is bad would be friends with Chaol. Her coworker was too nice to have bad friendships.

Lorcan seemed to think hard before answering, she didn’t know if that was a good sign. And he looked very different than before, he had a cigarette between his fingers and his long hair was tied in a bun.

“Depends. I like having a conversation with him, but I don’t think we are best friends.”

“What did you want to talk to him?”

“He gives some good advices. That’s why I wanted to talk to him. Also, to tell him about the retirement.”

His look gave Elide the impression he didn’t want to be alone, that he needed someone to talk to.

“I give good advice too.”

His head snapped at her and his onyx eyes focused on the shape of her face, of how her long black hair fell on her shoulders and descendent her chest and how her eyes showed wisdom and pain.

“Can I walk with you?” Lorcan asked, before analyzing the situation.

“Urgh...Ok. Just...keep some distance, we don’t know each other that well.”

“Sure.”

He waited for her to take some steps first, noticing the slightly limp, but not commenting on it. Elide threw him strange looks sometimes, probably now getting a better image of his face. Full of scars and a crooked nose.

“Why did you retire?” She asked when they stopped at a crosswalk, busy texting someone on her phone.

“I have enough money.”

Elide looked at him, not believing that was the truth.

“Somehow, I don’t believe you.”

“You just met me.” He said after both of them crossed the street and were now at the subway station block, few meters left before she entered the station and he was left alone.

The streets of Layel were filled with nothing but questions without answers, questions that people, while walking those streets, asked themselves repeatedly looking for an explanation. And Elide asked herself why she let him follow her to the station.

“Ok,  if you don’t want to talk about your problems...why are you walking with me?”

“Honestly, I don’t know.” She believed him then.

And for a second she wanted to stay and talk to him, he seemed strangely off but that didn't mean anything.

They reached the subway station and when she turned around she saw how far back he was, maybe five meters away. At least he was good at hearing and abiding rules.

“It was...something meeting you, Lorcan. I hope you are able to talk to Chaol soon.”

“Thank you.”

“Right, goodbye. Have a great retirement, and try to stop smoking, it will only kill you faster.”

Elide said and jumped to the moving staircase going down. The top of her head disappeared and Lorcan let himself drown in his thoughts while on the background _her_ eyes followed him.


	2. Young God

_ I'm a king and you're a queen and we will stumble through heaven _

_ If there's a light at the end, it's just the sun in your eyes _

_ I know you wanna go to heaven, but you're human tonight _

  
  


On the next day, Elide told Chaol about Lorcan. Even trying to get a hold of more information about the late boxer. Apparently, Chaol wasn’t a big help. Every time Elide jabbed with a question he returned his attention back to the boxes in front of him. Elide could respect that about him, he seemed to know how to keep secrets. The only thing she found out was the fact that Chaol and Lorcan knew each other because of a mutual friend and that the boxer is very reserved.

They kept logging some boxes, with Elide going around the storage and checking the labels on the equipment. She didn't have to do extra hours or go back home late for another two weeks. But she cleaned a lot of bathrooms and even met Chaol's wife one day when she came to pick him up.

After so many hours not talking to each other, Elide noticed that it was almost time to go home. Chaol was stretching his body and when he grabbed his cane he said that he would go quickly to the bathroom and then come back to help her close the system. She noticed he was stiffer than usual while walking, but it should be probably the cold weather. He said some days ago that his legs became incredible weak and sore during winter or cold days in general. Her mind was interrupted when he appeared again at the door, heaving. 

“Elide, I need your help...can you come to the bathroom with me?”

She noticed the dark spots on the hem of his sleeves.

Blood?

“Did you hurt yourself?”

“No...just come. Please.”

“Alright, alright, I'm coming.” She walked fast, the fastest she could due to her feet, and followed him to the men's bathroom. The door was looked and Chaol unlocked before letting her inside and then locking again. For a moment she thought that maybe she was being trapped and that triggered something inside her. But before a panic attack issued, her eyes caught movement in one of the stalls, Chaol motioned to her go look. She recognized the figure laying face down on to the floor.

“Why is he…?”

“I don't know. But I need your help to move him out of the stall and then I will call Yrene.” Chaol grabbed the hem of Lorcan's shirt and tried to lift but it was a failure. Now she understood why he needed her help so desperately.

Elide entered the stall and she saw the bloodied handprints around the inside walls, he must have been desperate to not fall on to the floor. Trying to grasp anything near him as a way to prevent his fall. He grunted when she placed her hands under his armpits and pushed him up so he could at least be out of the narrow space. Also, totally not hygienic for someone who probably has a cut somewhere judging by the amount of blood. Once he was laying down on his back, after some struggling, Chaol saw that the blood seemed to start at his torso.

“Take off his shirt...we have to see where the blood comes from. I'm going to call Yrene, oh boy, she's going to get so mad at me…” Elide ignores the rest of his mumbling while he dialed his wife's phone and inspected Lorcan's bare stomach. Indeed he had a cut on the left side of his stomach, near his belly button. She cut a piece of his shirt and put on the cut, pressing hard. She watched enough medical tv show to know that this is what your suppose to do when you need to stop someone from bleeding to death.

Was he at the stall for a long time? Seeing how the much blood he lost since Chaol brought her to the bathroom she guessed that not so much time passed since he got hurt. His raven strands of hair were once again tied up but they were almost falling from the elastic holding them up. His crooked nose was slightly purple, probably due to the fact he was facing down to the floor when they found him. And while she hated to admit, he had a particular face, a great particular face. And his expression was soften while he stayed unconscious, which was an odd look to Elide.

“Alright, Yrene is coming. She was already parking the car because I didn't show up at our meeting point... everything is going to be fine...she's going to patch him up and then we are done.”

“You should sit down, Chaol. And stop freaking out.”

“God's, I'm sorry to bring you to this...But I didn't want him to stay at that position…”

“It's fine. But what's going on?”

“I really don't know…”

Someone knocked on the door, so Chaol went to open and a beautiful woman entered Elide's vision. Yrene had big brown eyes and bronze locks that went down almost to her waist, and she looked worried.

“Chaol, where is he?” She set eyes on Elide, sitting with her both legs under her weight and bloody hands pressing down to the unconscious man on the floor. Not a great image for sure. “For Christ's sake.” She placed a bag next to Lorcan's head and kneeled down at the other side of his body. Giving one look at the firm hands of Elide. “I need to take a look.”

She was already wearing gloves, so Elide took her hands away from the gross liquid drenching her hands but still paid attention to what Yrene was doing.

“Ok, that's deep but didn't reach anything major…” Elide almost passed out seeing Yrene's finger going inside Lorcan's cut. “Yeah...none artery was caught...someone is skilled with knives.” For a second Elide wasn't sure what she heard was right. But the more she went through what Yrene mumbled, the more she realized it was truth. Someone did that to Lorcan, it wasn't an accident. “I need your help to hold him down. I'm gonna need to suture his cut and it's going to hurt because I don't have anesthesia with me.” Her eyes had a determination of someone in the middle of a mission. “Chaol, hold his legs down and Elide...try to gently prevent his upper body to move. I will only need five minutes and then it's done.”

Chaol and Elide nodding at the woman in charge and while Chaol praticable sat at Lorcan's legs, Elide had to be more cautions. She sat more comfortably and nestled his head on her lap, with one arm crossing his chest as if he was wearing a seatbelt. Lorcan's hair was free from its bun and that was complicating Elide's task. But her grip was firm, and when Yrene broke Lorcan's skin with the needle, his body jerked because of the pain. He mumbled something impossible to understand and Elide held him down.

What seemed to have been ten hours, was actually five minutes. Yrene cleaned the now closed cut and then sighed, sitting on the floor comfortably. She pulled a gauze from her box and placed above the cut.

“Ok, I'm done. He has to change his gauze every hour until tomorrow and then just check of there is any inflammation…”

“He lives alone, Yrene. He won't change it.” Chaol said as matter of fact.

“Well, I won't be babysitting. And you sure as hell won't too. He is just problems.” She turns to Elide, for the first time talking directly to her. “Hi, Elide. I'm sorry. It was hectic when I came.”

“I understand...I need to go home if that's ok?” Elide tried to stand up but her feet were sore and hurting. She will be having a long night ahead of her.

“Do you want a ride? We will have to leave Lorcan at his home, so it's only fair to do this nice thing for my medical assistant.” Yrene winked at her while her tone was of mockery.

“I don't want to intrude.”

“Don't worry. Just help me get this giant to the car and we can all go…”

Elide looked at the bloody floor around Lorcan's sleeping body and the handprints on the wall.

“I should probably clean this before…” She muttered, and then Chaol was suddenly grabbing tons of paper towels and watering them.

“I'm cleaning. You two go to the car with him.”

Yrene and Elide pushed Lorcan up, almost glad that he was half sleep because they couldn't carry him all the way to the parking lot with only their strength. Once again Elide was in a situation she never thought she would be. And so many questions flooded her mind. The couple seemed to know Lorcan very well, but they denied being friends. 

It was all very confusing to Elide. She didn't want to know, but the curiosity in her was deeper.

After they both struggled to get him to lay down on the back seat, Yrene caught a ballet and threw over his body. Another action that intrigued Elide.

“You and Chaol seem close to Lorcan.”

“Nope. We aren't. Well, depends. Urgh.” The nurse in front of Elide was at loss of words. “Look, you are new here. Lorcan Salvaterre is...a good guy.”

That didn’t make any sense.

“So why treat him as if you want distance?”

“Because it's what he brings with him that is bad news.” She came closer to Elide, closing the backseat door and leaning on the side of her truck. “You ever heard of Maeve?”

“No.”

“That's a good thing, because it means your life is away from her claws.”

“Is she part of a gang or something?” Elide asked almost dreading the answer. The way Yrene seemed tense while talking about this woman made Elide nervous.

“No, she is just someone who has money and power. But that means something in the competition world. She has many business, one of them is managing boxers. And people that work with her or get in the middle of it, gets screwed.”

“And what does that have anything to do with...oh.” She remembered now. When he said he was a boxer. When he said that he was retiring. “He said he was retiring.”

“I've seen my share of broken bones and broken hearts she leaves behind. I thought he wouldn't go to her, but they all go to her. They all go crawling to ask for work and more opportunities. They don't seem to realize they are giving her their soul.” Her eyes went to Lorcan and she was sad. “One of her man did... horrible things to Chaol because he saw Maeve doing something that he doesn’t even tell me. That was before he went to army, but still, it left him scars.”

“What! And the police?”

Elide's heart trembled inside her chest. Maeve's people assaulted Chaol? She must have been the one that hurt Lorcan too.

“Chaol got out alive and she doesn't even bat an eye at him anymore. I'm glad for that. I don't want to start this mess again by getting the police involved, there is no evidence.”

“This is so... frustrating. How come no one deals with her?”

But the conversation enders there. Chaol was getting closer to where Yrene parked her car, and when he slid to the passenger's seat, his wife gave him a kiss. Elide sat at the backseat, propping Lorcan's head on her lap and praying that he wouldn't wake up. She didn't want to deal with him at that moment and she was tired. Unfortunately when she gets to her house she will have to treat her right foot so he doesn't wake up bloated on the next morning.

Yrene put a soft song on the radio and Elide messed around with the sleepy person's hair next to her.

“June will have a scare when she sees the trash bins tomorrow morning…” Chaol mutters from the format of the car.

After giving them her address, it was only after ten minutes of driving that they parked in front of her one floor house. The lights were on so that meant that Manon's was at home.

“Thank for the help, Elide.” The couple stared at her, she waved to them and got inside the house. Too tired to notice that were two people making out on the couch.

Almost yelling of surprise, the couple stopped their kissing and Manon's cat eyes were on Elide.

“Sorry.” She looked at the man above her and whispered something. He then stood up and threw a smile to Elide, making her almost blinded by seeing his sapphire eyes gleaming. “Hi Elide. I lost track of time…” Manon picker her boots from the floor and starts to tiptoe to her room, but then she seems to remember that she doesn't have to hide. “Have an amazing night because I will surely have.” Her roommate winked and locked the door to her bedroom, where the man with beautiful eyes entered few seconds before.


	3. Without Me

_Gave love 'bout a hundred tries (Hundred tries)_

_Just running from the demons in your mind_

_Then I took yours and made 'em mine (Made 'em mine)_

_I didn't notice 'cause my love was blind_

 

While Elide was making her usual cup of tea, the door of Manon’s bedroom opened and the man from the night before was there. His blue eyes were even more impressive when he wore a white buttoned shirt, and he seemed ready to go to work.

“Good morning, Elide.” The man said before sitting on one of the stools of their kitchen. Elide was intrigued, Manon wasn’t the type that let her one night stands stay over, so this guy must be different somehow.

“Good morning...” She said before sipping her tea.

While they both sat there in silent, Elide took the time to observe him. He had a constant smile on his face, something that should probably irritate her roommate. And while he was handsome, Manon never would go out with a guy that only had looks on his advantage, she likes brains more than a charming smile. And the guy in front of Elide seemed to be all of the things Manon would hate in a guy.

“Doriaaaaan.” Manon pleading voice came from the bathroom and he chuckled noticing how flustered Elide was.

Manon appeared at the kitchen wearing her usual black jeans and red shirt, giving the man a peck on his cheek.

“Good morning, princeling.” He looked at her, mesmerized by how much he liked when she was near him. “This is my famous roommate, Elide. It was time you two met…”

“Oh, so you've been dating for some time?”

“She agreed to go out with me after some weeks of stalking her.” He turned to Manon and they both shared a meaningful look, probably thinking about their meet cute.

“He was a little off putting at the beginning, but then his dimples showed and I couldn't resist.”

They all eat breakfast together, that meant toasts and bacon. Elide learned that Dorian worked with his family, and that he graduated from Yale.

Manon talked a lot, explaining about her new gig at the Glass Castle, telling Elide she would buy nicer food this month. Elide got excited when shrimp was mentioned, it’s been ages since the last time she eat her favorite food.

After some minutes of routine talks and more information about the couple, that were together for two months already, Dorian said something about having to meet some people for business. They kissed and Elide heard the sound of his car getting out of the garage some time later.

Manon prompted herself on the couch and looked at Elide with a strange expression.

“I notice your foot is bad today.” Elide's roommate tapped her nails on the wood of the center table. “And that there was a lot of blood in your clothes from last night.”

Elide heart jumped. She didn't know how she should tell Manon about the day before and then she realized that she could ask Manon something that kept bugging her a lot.

“Do you know someone called Maeve?”

Manon's eyes went wide, and she tensed all up. She wondered why Elide was saying that name, and how much in trouble she was.

“Yes. Not a good person.”

“I heard her name yesterday. And don't worry about the blood...a guy from work cut himself with one of the box openers and Chaol and I helped until the ambulance arrived.”

The lie came before she could stop herself, not exactly knowing why she did that. Deep inside her, Elide thought that telling about Lorcan would only complicate this subject and maybe add someone else to the problem.

Someone hurt Lorcan yesterday.

That someone is probably in relation with Maeve.

And everyone is afraid of her.

“Don’t forget that tomorrow it will be my first official show at the Glass Castle!”

“I will be there...probably going with you, Manon. As always.” Elide gives Manon her best playful smile and they both giggle. “Dorian seems nice.”

“Of course he is.”

Elide’s roommate was too busy remembering the first time she and Dorian met to notice the knowing look Elide threw at her. Manon had a marvelous night, she got a deal to play three times a week at the Glass Castle and she knew that was a great opportunity to get the attention of music industry’s representatives. They were always looking out for new talents at this clubs and concert houses. Dorian appeared next to her, while she was busy talking to the bar menager, who was stupidly flirting with her. He seemed to be staring at her so she whipped her head and after a fast assessing of his persona, she decided she at least could hear him out. After two sentences she realized he was a charming person, something Manon would never say at his face but it was the truth. His sapphire eyes searched something in her, and that made her feel exposed, made her feel threatened. So she bid him goodbye and started to pack her things from the stage where she auditioned, feeling his gaze on her back. She wanted to shout at him, but that would only make him think she was crazy, something she isn’t. She is just a woman trying to get out of the pain in her memories.

Dorian didn’t gave up on that day. He was always around when the club seemed to be empty and soulless. Waiting for the silver hair magical woman, who somehow had mermaid’s voice that called up to him to show up. Dorian was a businessman, and even though his father was hating his absence at the office 24 hours per day, he needed to do something for his sanity. And that meant waiting for Manon Blackbeak.

“He is staying for some time.” Manon finally spoke.

“I’m glad to hear that.” Elide said while washing some of the dishes, it was always half for her and the other half for Manon to do it later. “What time is the show?”

“Around six because it’s Sunday.”

The rest of their saturday went the same as usual. Manon tried to clean her wardrobe and organize while doing it, but in the end she only found more things to put at the right place. She also separated some old clothes to donate to Goodwill and took the trash out. While Elide organized their bills and cleaned the living room. And when the clock reached midday, they decided to go down to the dinner four blocks away, where they could have a burger or something equally delicious.

On the next day, Elide woke up later than usual and found herself alone at her house. Manon must have gone out with Dorian or to jog before her show, she usually does that when she’s nervous. Dorian came back last night, eating dinner with them and telling Elide about the time he tried to be a ski contestant and failed miserably when he learned how high the ski contestant should jump. Later he went to Manon’s room and him and her stayed there for the rest of the afternoon while Elide watched a little bit of television.

When it was almost half past five, Manon came out of the room wearing her lucky black shirt and her faded gray jean, while Dorian next to her wore the same clothes from before. A linen white shirt with black trousers.

“Elide, are you ready?” Manon asked before looking up and down Elide and noticing she was wearing the same clothes all day and probably was going to wear at her show too. “Change now. You have an amazing high waisted pants that you never use and that green cropped you wore on my birthday.”

Manon dismissed Elide and praticable threw her roommate to the bedroom so she could change to something less casual and more ready to go out.

Elide really wanted to stay at home, but she felt like she should go to Manon's show. It's the right thing to do, and she can leave early and not stay until late with the band. Even if she wanted to meet them, she was exhausted from work and even if her feet were alright at the moment, she knew they were tired already.

“Let's go.” Elide said after picking her purse and going to the living room. She took the total of 20 minutes to get ready and her hair was a mess, but she decided to tie them in a bun and just go for it.

The drive to the Glass Castle club was filled with Dorian talking about his business travel. Manon was clearly upset about it because he would stay away for at least ten days, and at the start of every relationship people tend to glue to each other. Manon was never like that but Dorian was the exception of everything she used to do before. Apparently, Dorian was going to Singapore, which Elide was impressed because that meant that he must be successful. Elide at first thought he was going to a nearby country, not the other side of the world.

There was a line forming outside the club when they arrived, and after Manon went to met her band and organize the stage, Elide was left alone with Dorian. He seemed to be a little nervous, of Elide or whatever made him look around plenty of times.

They both stood next to each other, near a pilaster, and waited for the room to fill and the crowd to gather to then watch Manon start to play. She usually plays tons of covers from The Killers and Aerosmith, as well as two or three originals. Dorian beamed when Manon looked at them from the stage, throwing a wink and then introducing her band. Manon was the vocalist and lead guitarist, while the drums were played by Asterin, a beautiful golden locked woman and on the keyboard, Dalva with her blue eyes.

Everybody yelled at the band, excited to watch the show, excited to listen to Manon. Probably tons of old fans are out there waiting for the first chords to sound off her guitar.

Elide blamed the high volume, but after the first cover her ears were ringing painfully. She tried not to show discomfort because she wanted to be there for her friend, she wanted to prestige Manon doing what she loved.

After the lyrics of Mr. brightside ended, Elide's gaze wandered on the crowd and she saw a familiar figure leaning on the wall on the other side of the venue. Lorcan Salvaterre shouldn't be there after what happened on Friday. After so much blood. But there he was, with his always so sad expression and shoulder length hair. And even with the sad eyes he could do the expression of 'i hate everyone’.

Dorian was still jumping next to her, following the best of the song and mouthing the words. Like a good boyfriend. For that thought Elide smiled, she was happy that Dorian seemed to like Manon as much as she likes him. She was happy to finally seeing someone finding a little bit of light.

In the midst of the people, Elide tried not to separate from Dorian. She didn't want to be alone there and he started to guide both of them to the bar when the last song was coming to an end. Probably running away from the crowd too.

“What a show!” He yelled to Elide who wasn't listening that well but she could read his lips. “Do you want something to drink?”

She says no and they both wait for Manon, Elide sometimes looking for Lorcan out of worry. After that cut he should be resting on his bed and not in a club.

When Manon arrived she hugged Elide and kissed Dorian, later sitting on his lap and lacing her arm to his shoulders.

“Elide did you liked? More than the others?”

“Yes! You know I love your voice!”

Manon chuckled and notice Elide flinched every time the beat of the song changed tune.

“Do you want to go home?”

“I will take a taxi! Don't worry!” Elide thought that that would be her next exit argument. Because Manon would be worried if she said something about taking the bus so she pretended for her friend's sake.

After a quick goodbye, she left Dorian and Manon and the crowd of sweaty people behind and welcomed the cold air from outside.

She walked to the bus stop at the corner of the club, noticing that there were four people waiting. A couple, one girl lacing the waist of her girlfriend, an old man that was probably drunk judging by the fact that he was almost dancing while playing his fingers followed an imaginary song. And the last person there was, obviously, Lorcan.

His hair was the same shade of black from the last day they saw each other, and while he seemed less pale and bloody, she was worried that the cut wasn't being cleaned in the right way. Yrene made very clear that making sure the gauze was changed is a priority.

Elide decided to go closer to him, but only because his presence was more familiar and, let's say, safe compared to the other people. And seeing as it was night, she opted to not be alone.

“Hello…” Elide whispered only then noticing he was wearing earphones, not hearing anything around him. He was even with his eyes closed, Elide guessed that boxers didn't have much to fear from robbers. She poked him, making him look sideways and crease his forebrown in confusing.

He took off his earphones, placing them messily inside his jacket pocket, trying to give her full attention.

“Were you at the club?” Was his first words towards her that day.

“Yes, my roommate was the one singing.”

He nods, returning to keep staring straightforward and trying to not be so involved with the conversation. Something Elide noticed, the way he avoided eye contact and when he realizes he is looking, he averts his eyes to anything around them. Elide also noticed that he was a little hunched over.

“How’s the wound?” She asked while looking down the avenue, searching for her bus.

“Better…” Lorcan’s voice drifted off, lost in a thought or in something he saw. “Thank you, Elide.”

She knew for what. He didn’t need to tell her, because she could tell by the way he looked at her hands and the way his hand covered the side of his stomach that had been cut few days ago. His sincerity is what she wasn’t understanding, he always came off as being closed up and a brute, but his voice then sounded nice. Sounded truthful and sad.

“You could pay me a cup of coffee as a thank you.”

She wasn't even finished thinking about what she implied by that when he blurted out an answer.

“Now it’s a bad time?”

The exhaustion on his face made her want to turn him down, she knew he should be resting and not out and about with her. But she also knew he wanted to talk about something, anything...everything, maybe.

“I know a place near my house, is that alright?”

“Yes.” He then indicated a bus that was stopping near them, wondering if that was the bus to her house.

“Oh, come on!”

They both rushed to the opening doors, she greeted the driver knowing that he would never wait for someone at a bus stop and kind of hating him for that. It was a prejudgement but she couldn't help, tons of bus drivers had speed when she limped and yelled to the bus to wait.

Elide decided to seat next to the window, leaving the aisle seat to Lorcan. When he finished passing his bus card, he looked up and hesitated. He didn't know what to do, if he should seat next to her, where they would be so close he would probably fridge or if he should seat in front of her, being the receiver of her quizzical eyes the entire drive. He opted for the first one.

“This is my bus too.” Lorcan said after solid five minutes in silence, in which Elide discovered that she liked having him near her, he was quiet and peaceful for some reason and that made her relax.

“Well, that's something. You live alone?”

“All my life.”

“Don't you and Chaol hang out a lot? I really don't get your friendship…” Elide laughed frustrated because she was being awkward and invasive, but she couldn't resist. She wanted him to talk to her, and if pressing him made him talk, she would press him hard.

“Yrene doesn't...approve? This sounds strange.”

“Yrene seems to think- Oh we need to get off here.”

Elide pressed the button to stop at the next stop and Lorcan moved to stand, waiting for her to go before him and being on alert of the bus came to a halt. He would be ready to catch her.

“It's three blocks away. It's a very cozy coffee shop that it was the main reason I decided to stay here.”

“Here?”

“In the city.”

His mouth formed an ‘O’ as they proceed to walk, and Elide knew he wanted to ask more. She wouldn't mind telling him some of her personal stuff, she was open about most of it. Some of the things she wanted to hide, as why her foot like that or what made her come to the city in the first place. But she knew it was too soon for him to ask any of that so she was relieved.

“There…” She guided him through a wooden door, ornamented with leaves and sticks, setting the mood of something mystical and comfortable. Lorcan almost had to hunch a little to pass through the door frame, but when his eyes went to the cashier he knew this place was different.

A strange and good kind of different.


	4. Walls Could Talk

 

_ Been about three days and I'm comin' back _

_ I'm about four minutes from a heart attack _

_ And I think you make me a maniac _

_ But you don't know _

  
  


The thing that most shocked Lorcan was that no one looked sad there, and even though it was a cold night everyone seemed to be humming a song or just smiling at everything in general. Not in an annoying way, but more of a refreshing kind of scenario for him.

“Is this a cosplay place?” He murmured to Elide when they both finished settling themselves in a corner booth, the dim lights were making him a little sleepy but the smell of fresh coffee and mint made wonders to his constant headache, that seemed to be lessen as the small fills his body.

“Well, I don’t think so…”, looking at the waitress Elide noticed she was wearing a fae type of costume and had pastel pink hair tied in a high bun. “I never noticed that before…”

Lorcan smiled at that admission, realizing that Elide was one of those type of people that don’t really pay attention to anyone's clothes or even belongings. She didn’t seem to judge him by his broken image so he always knew she was a decent woman. Deep inside of him, he was happy that when he needed to find Chaol, he found her understanding eyes back then.

“I come here mostly to read or listen to music, not much looking around is involved.” Elide passed her hands through her hair as a way to bridge the change of subject. “So...are you changing the dressing regularly?”

“Yes. Yrene was very demanding about that, graphically explaining how painful is to die from infection.”

He shuddered, remembering the almost powerpoint presentation Yrene sent him via email.

“So, do you want something to drink?”

“Coffee.”

Elide smiled, she stood up and he made a movement as if he was going to stand up but she shushed him and winked in a playful way. His heart did an unusual flip inside his chest, he coughed thinking this sensation was just something stuck at his throat.

He watched her as she passed through a couple that was under a random mistletoe, and she picked her wallet, a decaying one, and said something to the cashier smiling.

Lorcan received a text message, he knew whom it was, it was always the same person. He didn’t even bother to check it, already infuriated by the audacity of her contacting him, even though he made it clear he didn’t want anything from her anymore.

He focused on the girl at the other side of the coffee shop, the girl whom he feels can understand him and maybe even be friends with. Someone that would treasure him, not in a romantic way, it was too early to think about that and he didn’t even know if he was even capable of feelings like that nowadays.

Her brownish intense eyes turned to him, she threw a smile at him, a little careful because she didn’t want him to think she was flirting but only reassuring him of something. Maybe their coffees would take a while to get ready, maybe she just smiled at him because it was something she did. She was a hidden agenda, ready to be unveiled and known.

Lorcan Salvaterre felt a buzzing going through his veins, a warm and comfortable feeling penetrating his skin, and when she turned to walk towards him holding two cups, she felt he could eventually fall for a girl like that. A girl that had magic on her footsteps.

“I asked the cashier and she is indeed wearing a costume, something about a ‘Sailor Moon’?” She placed the cup in front of him, noticing his hands were linked together seeking for warm. “Lorcan, who hurt you that day?”

He almost choked with her question, caughting him out of guard as he sipped the bitter black coffee.

She did that on purpose judging by her lack of reaction at seeing him coughing. Elide was so curious to find out but it was strange, because she didn't have any power to do something about it.

“I-”

“If you tell me that you fell I’m going to leave this table.”

“I wasn't going to say that but, why do you care?”

“You bleed a lot and I hate seeing people getting hurt. That’s a good reason for you?”

Elide put her coffee on the table, waiting for him to start to rise or even tell her how noise she is, but instead he looked at her. For the first time she felt he was really  _ looking  _ and it made her body want to crawl away, to hide and to not let him read her.

He then proceed to lean back on his chair, not once looking away from her. And that made her almost want to punch him, and that was ironic if you think about what she just said to him.

“Chaol must have told you about Maeve.”

“Yrene.”

“Of course.” He said that as if he knew Yrene would do that, as if it was a betrayal he always knew it was coming. “She loves to remind people that I am close to Maeve.” Something close to disgust appeared on his features.

“So this Maeve did that to you?”

“I did it to myself. I knew she was going to retaliate.”

“Retaliate by stabbing you? What kind of woman is she? An ex gang member?”

She said that in a mocking tone, but seeing Lorcan’s expression shift to a more serious one made her tensed up.

“Ex girlfriend…But I don’t think she knew that we were dating.”

“How is that possible?”

Elide tried to imagine what Maeve looked alike, and the thing she imagined was the stereotype of a bad girl from her school back in the day.

“I don’t know.”

They each sipped their drinks while a loud silence started between them. They each didn’t know how to proceed about it, they wanted to talk but not about these heavy stuff. Still, Elide knew that finding out more about Maeve would help with this blooming friendship. She knew Maeve was a huge part of his life, she even stabbed the man so intense feelings are involved.

“So, you retired?” Elide asked realizing that she knew the answer.

“Boxing is not so good to your health if you didn’t know that. So players usually retire early.”

“But something happened?”

Elide knew it was a stupid question, because obviously something happened. Something always happens between people to lead to a break up, and whatever happened with Maeve and Lorcan...looked like a break up to Elide.

“I wanted to get away from Maeve.”

“I thought she was your...girlfriend?”

Lorcan was amused by Elide’s question, she didn’t understood what was happening on his mind for him to be having fun with it.

“I worked for her agency. She owned me, basically. My feelings were completely irrelevant to her.”

“You say that as if you were an animal…” The way he looked at her, Elide realized that it was exactly how he felt. She knew now that whatever it was his relationship with Maeve, it wasn’t equal or healthy. It was something that hunted him, that clawed his heart out somehow. “It’s good that you are detaching yourself from her then...”

Lorcan didn’t want to talk anymore. Memories of his teenage years flooded his mind, and remembering that he went to look for Maeve in the first place, even knowing about the rumours around her family and especially her.

“It’s better to go now...the girl at the cashier is staring at us as if pleading for us to go so she can close.”

She looked at the sailor moon girl and she was indeed looking at them, and when noticing Elide’s gaze she tried to pretend she was busy with something else. Elide felt bad, so they both stood up and went outside of the coffee shop. 

It was late they both realized. Almost eleven pm and Elide needed to go to bed because a long day waited for her the next day.  A long day of unboxing and fill forms, at least she could put her earphones and listen some music while doing it or talk with Chaol if he stayed at the storage room.

“My house is two blocks away, you should go to the bus stop before the last bus passes there.”

Lorcan thought for a moment to ask her if she wanted some company to go to her house, but he thought it would sound as if he was flirting with her and asking for more than a simple escorting service. He stayed quiet, looking at her while she waved at him two meters away from him, she was already walking away and he hoped that she would keep talking with him in the future.

While Lorcan waited for her to fade from his vision, Elide walked towards her house relieved to finally have had a full conversation with Lorcan. She was happy that he willingly shared something with her, and the strange thing was that she was confused. Confused because even if she told him that she would talk and listen to his problems, he accepted. Accepted even though they knew each other for few days. 

Elide knew he was looking at her, she could feel the strange sensation hitting her shoulder blades. And while walking down the street and then turning left on her block, she found out how much she still wanted to know about him and maybe helping him. How much she cared, and Manon’s voice telling her she should stop putting other people’s happiness before hers came to her mind. It wasn’t like that. She didn’t suffered while hearing what Lorcan had to say, she sat there and tried to engage him more.

Elide learned early in life that even though it was hard to trust people, we should always try to open our hearts a little bit. Always expect the best in people, and not always have a pessimist mind and think that everyone you meet is there to destroy you.

A little bit of faith in people is something that takes a long time to have, but once you reach that place...Elide was lucky enough to have found Manon when everything seemed bad. She had the chance to trust someone that she knew would never intentionally harm her, a best friend that would listen to her and that knew most of her secrets.

She wanted that for Lorcan too. She wanted that Chaol stopped being so reluctant on admitting he was friends with Lorcan and just be a friend and period. She wanted to Yrene to stop being so harsh with Lorcan, because Elide knew that the couple cared for him. 

Elide wanted to save the world.

Yes, it was a naive thought coming from her, but she couldn’t help to wish that the world should be a better place. That everyone needed a hug or a friend.

Nobody deserves to be alone.

When Elide unlocked the door, it was to find once again Manon and Dorian on the couch. But this time they were both watching some television, Dorian looked at Elide and smiled. Then pointing at the sleeping Manon leaning on his shoulders, snoring smoothly. Elide’s heart melted with the scene, she once wished her friend would find peace next to someone she loved romantically and she have found it. Manon found on those blue eyes something the aimed throughout her whole childhood and life, safety.

She walked to her room, where she let it out a sigh of relief. After a quick shower and putting her warm pajamas, she lay down on the bed. Hoping she would dream or have nightmares. Wondering if Lorcan is actually cleaning his wound and wondering if Manon is indeed happy with Dorian.

***

 

The next day proved that life sometimes can be awful.

Elida woke up late, somehow her alarm didn’t go off when it was supposed to go and she woke up with the sound of Dorian making coffee. Apparently he likes to sleep at her house and making breakfast to Manon, which was both annoying and cute at the same time.

Then the subway had the audacity of breaking when she just got inside so there wasn’t a way of getting out of it, and of course she forgot her key car so she had to call Chaol for him to open the back door to her.

“I’m sorry, Chaol! I don’t know what is happening...I had the worst morning…”

“Don’t worry. The boxes came just now so I didn’t even started yet. But I need your help to move them.”

Elide forgot about her feet, about the pain on her back and how sweaty she was. She went to help Chaol and lost herself with the routine they had ahead of them, not even stopping to think about the night before and how much she wanted to talk with Chaol about  Lorcan. 

It was almost lunch time, and Chaol sat down next to Elide, opening his box of food that she was sure Yrene prepare it because of the goofy smile he had on his face. She forgot to bring food so she went outside to buy a burger or sushi, the cheapest one of course. When she went back holding a box of sushi, she found herself interrupting a conversation Chaol was having on his cellphone.

Chaol noticing that Elide was back, bid his goodbyes to whoever was at the other end of the call and looked at Elide with a strange expression.

“Have you been talking to Lorcan these days?”

“Yes, we went to grab a coffee after my roomates concert. Why?”

“He was strange in the phone...and asked about you.”

“Strange how?” A spark of worry.

“He wants to hang out...and I don’t know how to feel about this?”

Chaol sat next to his box of food, and Elide came to sit beside him. Placing her food on her lap and opening it.

“Chaol, just go out with him. I think both of you need more friends.”

“Says the person with a rocking social life…” He said sarcastically.

“I have you, Manon, her boyfriend, Yrene and Lorcan. I can safely say I’m alright in the friendship department.” Elide said that before placing a sashimi inside her mouth.

“Yrene is so against this...It’s not that she doesn’t like him, Elide. But he is too close to Maeve and that woman is horrible.”

Elide kept eating. She didn’t know what to say, she liked Yrene and she knew Yrene cared for Lorcan. But she chooses to stay away from him, knowing it would only bring her and Chaol problems again. And it’s not like Elide is an expert of what to advice in a relationship almost crisis. 

She had only two brief relationships after her twenties, one of them ending with a punch on the guy’s face. Strangely, she felt like it wasn’t the time to search for a boyfriend and time to focus on paying the bills and maybe travel overseas later that year.

“You should check at least if he is changing the dressing of his wound...I get the impression he isn’t.”

Chaol nodded, making Elide notice he wanted to end the conversation. She really wanted to talk to Manon about this, maybe they could ask for pizza that night and chat, it’s been a while since the last time it was just her and her roomate.

The afternoon went smoothly, even with the morning being a mess, and while Chaol left early she stayed behind just to make up for the minutes she lost because of the late arrival. There were only three boxes left to catalog, filled with new lamps and locks in the case that the ones that are currently been used glitch at some point during the next event the stadium held.

Elide felt her foot starting to ache, so she stayed put for a while and tried to do finish up everything without moving so much. Her cellphone had some texts but she couldn’t look at the moment, probably Manon asking about dinner or letting Elide know Dorian would be joining them. She wished that just for that day Manon would chill at home in front of the tv watching soap operas with her.

When Elide passed through the back door of the stadium, was to find Lorcan leaned his back on the wall of the alley.

“Be glad I was not with my pepper spray this time.”

He was looking at her with a mischievous expression, so she nodded at him and walked towards him.

“I was passing by and wondered if you were still here…”

“Ok, let’s walk to the subway then.”

When they reached the streets, Elide noticed a black car that was driving way too slow in the street and for a moment she thought that it was following them. But then the car fasten up and disappeared on the next corner on the right.

Lorcan busied himself with his hands, placing them inside his pockets and hunching a little to the front, making Elide think that his wound was hurting.

“How’s the wound?”

“Routine question...It’s alright. I cleaned yesterday, just so you know.”

When they reached the subway station, Lorcan this time went with her. They both went down the staircases, Lorcan sometimes going closer to her and then suddenly taking a step away. Maybe not wanting to invade her personal space and Elide found herself thinking that it was okay if he did that, they were friends, at least is what she thought.

“Where are you going?” She asked a little curious.

“Nowhere, everywhere...I have a lot of free time now.”

“Why don’t you find a hobby?” They were now at the platform, waiting for the M train to pass so she could finally go home. Apparently she will be having a company during the twenty minutes inside the train. “Maybe you should choose something more...calm?”

“I like to run, I was thinking of just keep doing that.” Lorcan said as the train comes to a stop in front of them, opening its doors and welcoming them to the train full of people.

Elide held tight to one of the holders above their heads, but she couldn’t stand still because of the moving train and the fact that people kept passing and sometimes stomping on her feet, good and bad one. 

Lorcan had both of his hands above his head, clenching on the holders, and Elide chose to lean slightly towards him. better than lean on a stranger. Her arm brushed on his chest, making him look down at her. Elide never once notice how tall Lorcan was, how broad were his shoulders and how his ebony eyes seemed to be a different shade than usual.

“Am I touching your wound?” She asked without breaking their gaze.

He moves his head indicating that Elie didn’t touch anything, and they stayed there. Looking at each other. Having a mental conversation about nothing, but the silence did wonders to Elide’s sanity after the horrible day she had. His company, even if not so talkative, was better than many other and better than being all alone in the midst of that crowd. His presence, at that exact moment, was everything.

Lorcan had his mind in peace, even with Maeve being hunting his thoughts these past few days. Looking at Elide made everything silent, somehow comforting him from the crappy month he’s been having. 

Neither of them noticed that someone has been following them since Elide exited the stadium she worked.


	5. Colors

_ You're dripping like a saturated sunrise _

_ You're spilling like an overflowing sink _

_ You're ripped at every edge but you're a masterpiece _

_ And now i'm tearing through the pages and the ink _

 

“-went to talk with the driver but he didn’t even rolled down the window!”

Elide entered her living room while Dorian talked. It was a beautiful Saturday and they were planning to go out to eat something, apparently Dorian new a really great Korean restaurant at the university neighborhood fifteen minutes away. According to Manon, he was going to pay for all of us because he is in debt with her. And when she said that, Elide knew it had something to do with with what they did behind doors. 

“What are you talking about?”

“There is this car parked at the other side of the street that is in a prohibited spot!” Dorian said in a aghast tone. He was way by the rules than Elide imagined. “I went to talk with the drive but he ignored me…”

“Princeling, let it be.” Manon smoothed his brown hair and kissed his temple. “It’s Saturday, relax.”

“I am chill. What gets me mad is that this person doesn’t seem to mind to get a ticket!”

“People sometimes have too much money and don’t mind spending it...let’s just watch the anime, Dorian. Stop obsessing.”

Dorian seemed a little bit taken back by her words, as if she said something that made him relate. But then he leaned his head over her shoulder and exhaled. 

Elide had a great week, even if started off really bad. On Monday, after Lorcan accompanied her to her house, they exchanged numbers and they have been texting a lot throughout the week. He was mostly monosyllabic, but Elide realized that he liked way too much of using emojis. She thought it was funny, considering how Lorcan looked in real life.

Then on Wednesday she went out with Chaol and Yrene to have a beer and chat, finding out at the moment they arrive at the bar that Chaol had invited Lorcan too. Yrene wasn’t that happy, but she seemed to forget her worries because she talked eagerly to him about strange admissions at the hospital she works as a nurse.

Finally, Friday came and once again Lorcan was waiting outside of the back door. Leaning on the wall of the alley, listening to something on his headphones and looking a little less intimidating while doing it. 

And then Saturday came. After a long week of unpacking stuff at the storage unit, Elide was glad to finally sleep until ten and relax at her house. With the ever presence of Dorian and Manon. Elide wondered sometimes if he even went back to his home or if he was just living there.

Elide went to the front window, trying to get a glimpse of the car Dorian has been talking about. A black car, a model and color very common these days, was indeed parked in a elderly spot. The windows were black so she couldn't see who was the driver. Maybe the driver thinks that during weekends the spot is free to anyone’s use.

“You guys want tea?”

“No, but I want to know who was the man with you yesterday.” Manon never left anything unsaid.

“You know, Lorcan. Chaol’s friend.”

“You two seemed pretty cozy walking together…”

Dorian huffed a laugh. Trying to make Manon to stop being so curious, but she was Manon, ruthless and did whatever she wanted.

“He’s my friend and currently retired. So we meet and walk together sometimes. Nothing dramatic, Manon.” Elide was afraid of saying anything wrong, not that something was wrong, but Manon is known for having a very imaginative mind. “No, Manon. He isn’t my secret boyfriend.”

She said that with a mocking tone, kind of having a laugh because she knew her roommate was thinking that.

“Well, I wasn’t going to say anything.” Manon smirked and went back to the TV and Dorian’s arms.

Elide prepared her green tea, then going to her room to finally breathe and sort it out this pressure on her breathing ability. Also, she needed to put her feet up and relax before going out for lunch.

She laid down on the bed, with her hair tied up in a bun and her green tea placed next to her bed while she read some files she had. Many thing she brought from Morath, some papers she had thrown inside her bag when fleeing her uncle’s house some years ago. She never stop to look through then and see if there is anything about her parents or anything that could put her uncle in jail.

Unfortunately, before she could start reading the second batch of paper, Manon knocked on her door telling it was time to go.

So there they went. The couple that never is separated and Elide, their official third wheel. Walking down the street to where Dorian parked his...luxury car?

“Dorian, you have a nice car.”

He flushed, a little embarrassed that Elide kept ogling at the car but after they were all inside of it, using the nice AC, they stayed in a comfortable song until they reached the restaurant.

They were sitting on a table in front of the enormous glass window at the front of the place, and while Dorian and Manon held hands above the table and looked through the menu, Elide noticed a crowd just arriving at the door. 

After getting rushed by an anxious waiter, and with their drinks already on the table, Manon decided to finally speak about something she’s been holding back the whole week.

“Elide, I want Dorian to move in with us.”

Dorian, who was next to her sipping his ice tea, almost choked with what she said. Apparently he didn’t know about Manon’s plans and that made Elide smile. They were barely dating for so long but they seemed to always have an understanding between them, even surprising each other.

“Manon, don’t you think you should ask Dorian first?”

“Yes, you should ask me first…” He murmured recovering from almost drowning.

Manon whipped her head to look at him, placing a hand on his cheek.

“I know you, Dorian. Eventually you will agree with me that living together will be a blast. Let’s face it, we can be far away from each other for so long…”

Elide deciding it was better to leave them alone for a few minutes, stood up and went outside of the restaurant. She decided to check on Lorcan and see if he wants to hang out later, maybe inviting Chaol and Yrene to come along. Her call went straight to voicemail and she got a little annoyed with his tendency of never picking up his phone and now apparently it was dead. She looked over to the table inside the restaurant, where Dorian and Manon were still talking very close to each other and looking adorable. 

Someone brushed past her, a woman with long black hair threw a look at her and hissed, as if an animal. The woman kept walking while next to a guy wearing a tux, they disappeared from Elide’s view and she decided to go back inside.

Her cell phone went off as she walked the two steps to go inside again, she looked at the screen and Lorcan named shined.

_ “Where are you?” _ His voice sounded a little bit alarmed but Elide was more amused then thrown back.

“Hello, Lorcan...What a wonderful afternoon, how are you?”

_ “Alright, alright…” _ He huffed, as if annoyed.  _ “Are you free?” _

“I’m having lunch with Manon and Dorian. It will take one hour for us to go back home, why?”

_ “Because I want to see you.” _

Her heart was beating fast, as well as her mind working faster than before. Lorcan always seemed to drop some cute sentences when she least expected and without even meaning truthly what he was saying. It was just his way of blurting out whatever he is thinking. He hated small talk, and she was used to that because Manon was like that too.

“Come to my house around three, we can watch a movie with Manon and Dorian.”

_ “Why are you subjecting me to be a third well?” _

“Hush, Lorcan...at least you have company while doing it.”

Manon was waving at Elide for her to go back to the table.

“Hum, Lorcan we will see each other later… Bye.”

He didn’t say anything. He stayed quiet and waited for her to end the call, he always felt awkward with goodbyes and saying them outloud was weirder.

She went back to her table, already knowing she would have a new roommate by the expression on the couple’s face.

“Roomie?” Elide asked to Dorian hopefully.

“Yes, Manon convinced me it would be better for everyone if I stayed with you guys for a while.”

Their food arrived right after Dorian finished his sentence, they all laughed and talked about their jobs and Manon’s new songs that she is composing. The songs seemed oddly cheerful but with a dark tone, just like Manon these days. Elide was happy seeing her friend so smiley, she never used to do it before. Always moody and brody, but now with Dorian she was letting go all of her frustrations with life.

Maybe things were getting better for both of the girls. Manon seemed happy with her band, she seemed in love with Dorian and he treated her well. Elide had a job that even though it was very difficult, she liked to get tired by doing it at the end of the day. And she had new friends, Chaol, Yrene and Lorcan.

Her uncle couldn’t reach her anymore.

He wouldn’t be able to find her.

And even if he did so,  she had the strength to fight back .

Dorian insisted on paying the bill and Elide wondered with what exactly did he worked with, he always seemed to bring food to their house, paid lunch and dinners most of the times and he uses a really nice car. Basically, he was still a mystery and Elide thought that maybe Manon knew the answers to everything. But she would never interrogate Manon about her boyfriend.

“Well, I’ve eaten for the whole week!” Manon exclaimed after leaning back on her seat of the car. “Thanks, Princeling.”

“I loved the food, too. Specially that Bibimbap…” Elide was already dreaming with the food she eat at the restaurant, it was one of the most delicious plate she ever had in her life.

Manon turned to watch Elide on the backseat.

“You look happy.”

“I am, Manon. We had a nice lunch and your boyfriend is actually funny.” Elide smirked and saw the corner of Dorian’s lips go up.

Manon went back to the normal position and took Dorian’s hand. While he drove with only one hand on the steering wheel, paying way too much attention to the one block left their house. And while Elide was happy he was apparently moving in with them, she feared what will happen if they broke up right after it. Manon would be a mess probably bottling everything up,  and when she finally exploded those emotions out...Elide wasn’t sure if she will be able to pick up the pieces.

“Oh...I know why Elide will be extremely in seconds...”

And when Manon said that, Elide knew that Lorcan was waiting outside the house for her.

They parked on the empty spot right in front of their house, something that was improbable in a normal day but highly possible on the weekend.

And there he was. Lorcan had his hands inside his jeans pockets, his hair was down, brushing his shoulders. He seemed lost in thought until he heard the car parking right next to him, he looked up and scrunched up his face as if pissed at something.

“Hi, Lorcan…” 

His whole face changed when seeing Elide getting out of the car, followed by Dorian and Manon.

“Hey.”

He nodded at the couple as they passed next to him, Manon winking at Elide and then disappeared through the front door. Leaving Lorcan and Elide on the sidewalk in front of the house.

“Are you alright?”

“I think Maeve’s people are following you.”

“Hum...that’s crazy, Lorcan. Why she would be following me?” Elide was a little taken back by this statement because that was an absurd. He seemed alarmed but still with an angry expression, his hands were furiously clenching while talking with her. “And I’m sure you are just worried for nothing. It’s not like she is going to kidnap me…” Her laugh died down after some seconds of him staring at her with a non amused expression. Elide noticed he did that face a lot.

He searched something on his cellphone and then showed Elide the screen. It looked like a text message with a picture attached. Tons of pictures, actually. Which made Elide grab the cellphone from his hands and look more carefully.

Elide was looking a many pictures of her walking down the streets she normally walk to go to the subway station or to get home, they were from two days ago and Elide’s body trembled slightly. What were those pictures doing on Lorcan’s phone? And why below them was a text message saying:

_ Someone that I can hit with my car if I get distracted... _

The threatening tone was enough to make Elide’s mouth gape and look quizzical at the man in front of her. Her eyes went to the strange black car that just parked at the other side of the street and that was four cars ahead of them, realizing that it was the same plaque as the one that was parked before they went out to eat. 

“Lorcan...that doesn’t make any sense.”

“Yrene and Chaol must have told you about what she is capable to do.”

“And you liked her? Lorcan…”

“I just wanted to make sure no one was bugging you.”

That made her heart tug a little bit. It was always strange when he said those things to her, it was a side of him that she didn’t believe it was his usual one. And when he showed her that side, it showed how much he felt comfortable around her. Even if they met in less than a month ago.

“Everything is alright...don’t worry.” She handed him his cell phone back, noticing that his knuckles were bruised. “Are you boxing again? Didn’t like retirement?” Her tone was playful, but she was still thinking about the pictures.

His face was also still serious, even her little try to change the subject didn’t make him have any reaction. His eyes though, they wavered a little.

“Just a few punches…”

He put his hands back inside his pockets and then looked over Elide’s house, with a strange look in his eyes.

“Do you want to watch a movie with us?” He was hesitant, Elide could tell by the way he kept hunching over and then trying to stand taller than he was. He was always overly moving, probably the constant adrenaline on his system.

“I just wanted to show you the pictures. I want to go for a jog…”

“Wearing jeans?”

Elide crossed her arms in front of her chest a little amused by him trying to get away from any social interaction.

“I’m going to change and I would invite you but-”

“You noticed I have a bad feet.”

They never talked about that. Elide felt awkward if she was the one to bring it up and he never asked about it, so she left it unsaid. But he must have noticed that sometimes she limps and other times she drags a little her foot while walking.

“Well, still...you can jog anytime. Why don’t you make new friends?”

“Three is enough.”

“Stop being difficult. C'mon…”

She did something she always avoided.

Elide caught his hand, and then tried to push him towards the front door. His skin was warm, and his lips started to form a smile but then he often never had a full one plastered on his face, just one that showed he was amused.

“Not today, Elide. I’m not- I just don’t feel like…”

She let go of his hand.

“Ok, no pressure here.”

Elide put her hands up as if giving up and smiled, it was all she could give him at the moment. She was a little bit pissed at him for always making things awkward. Always not wanting to meet Manon properly. For always hesitate to let go of his walls around his heart.

He turned around, he meant to go away and not even saying goodbye to her because he felt too nervous to do anything at that moment.

But then seeing the way her eyes closed taking a second longer than normally, he knew she was mad at him so because of that he decided to let go of this nervousness and do whatever he wanted.

That meant taking the few steps separating them and leaning down to place a soft and long kiss to her forehead, which was something very unusual to do these days. But he felt it was the right thing to do. And when he stepped away, the soft redened of Elide’s cheeks made everything worth it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merry Christmas everyone!!
> 
> This is my last update of the year! But rest assured that I will be coming back on January with the last five chapters( I think more five chapter but i'm not sure yet)!
> 
> Thanks for everyone that has been following this story and have a happy new year too!


	6. Bad at Love

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for taking so long to update but life got in the way (by life I mean work lol)
> 
> Hope you all enjoy this chapter!
> 
> <3

_I'm bad at love (ooh-ooh)_

_But you can't blame me for tryin'_

_You know I'd be lyin' sayin'_

_You were the one (ooh-ooh)_

_That could finally fix me_

  


Elide went to her room right after Lorcan finally disappeared at the street corner, and when Manon tried to talk with her, she dismissed her friends and went directly to bed.

It was a cliche thing to do, Elide realized, but she gushed a little bit while with her head smashed on her pillow. This sensation on her chest, was something out of a movie or book and she was happy for finally feeling that. The tingling sensation was still on where Lorcan’s lips touched few minutes ago, and she could still see his face in front of her eyes. His harsh jawline, and deep dark eyes focused on her face was something that made her heart beat faster than ever.

She heard a knock on her door.

“Hey, Elide. Why Lorcan didn’t stay?”

“He went for a jog.”

“Oh, okay. By the way, Dorian decided to go and pack some of his things…Why you look so strange?”

Elide finally looked at her roomate.

“Nothing, it’s just a good day.”

Manon looked suspiciously at her roommate but decided to let Elide have her moment of daydreaming about Lorcan. She wasn’t stupid, Manon knew what a ‘good day’ to Elide implied. She just hoped that Lorcan treated her friend in a good way, she is done of seeing her roommate and best friend always moping when she thinks Manon can’t see it.

After a few minutes Elide heard the sound of a car pulling out from the front of the house, and the low sound of the tv turning on, she decided to go and watch tv with her roomate.

Manon threw her a quizzical look when she sat down on the couch, her cell phone beeped and was delighted to see that it was a short and surprisingly sweet message from Lorcan. How he got her number? She didn’t care.

_Be careful_

_See you around_

_-Lorcan_

 

She put her cell phone away after not responding, Elide wasn't going to think about with what he wanted her to be careful of. For a second she wanted to stand up and go to the window, to see if she caught a look at that mysterious car from before that she now knew it was probably Maeve. At the end she opted to stay sitting on her couch, watching a marathon of FRIENDS.

Dorian came back when it was getting dark, he looked exhausted and carried two bags and there was one box at his feet. His girlfriend helped him put the things inside the house and then they disappeared to the bedroom, Elide decided to call for a pizza.

Elide thought that it would be good to have him around, Manon seems happier than ever and Dorian would help with the rent, so that was a plus.

After she organized the money to pay for the pizza that should be here any minute, she sat on the couch, contemplating how Dorian would make his things feat with Manon’s stuff.

Manon came out of the bedroom carrying a plastic bag with many clothes in it, judging by the pair of jeans almost touching the ground while she carried the bag to the surface of the table. She rummage through some of the clothes inside and then sighed.

“I’m cleaning my wardrobe to give him some space and I think I’m going to donate these...Anything you want for yourself, feel free to go through the bag. Taking the things to the church donation office tomorrow.”

“Oh, ok. And how are things there?” Elide motioned to the bedroom. “Are you happy with our new roommate?”

She glanced at Dorian inside the bedroom, he was neatly folding his clothes to put in the drawer and humming an old song that it was probably something out of classic rock, and she felt happier than she ever was by just seeing something so normal.

“I’m eager to this new phase of my life.”

“He’s a nice guy.”

She turned to look at Elide, with an amusing expression.

“And that tall and mysterious guy that you call Lorcan...must be a nice guy too.”

“Oh, just shut up.” Elide threw a pillow at Manon who giggled. “I wanted to maybe ask him out but I think he has too much in his plate at the moment…”

Manon sat next to Elide, wondering what Lorcan could possibly have going on in his life that made Elide hesitate.

“What? Like an ex or something?”

“Hum...he kind of worked for Maeve...”

“What?!” Manon almost yelled. She was shocked to know that the man Elide is interested would be entangled with Maeve, that woman suckes the life out of people and let them to die off alone.

“He said he is not anymore...but-”

“But what?”

A voice coming from Manon’s bedroom took them by surprise.

“But now she is making his life a hellhole.” Dorian came to sit next to Manon, looking angry by whatever things he had in his mind. “I know that because my family has been dealing with people of her type and her for a long time.”

“Everybody knows about Maeve. How wrong is to even ask her for help...there is always a price. How come Lorcan ended up working for her.”

“I don’t know, Manon. I just know that apparently she finances some boxers and when he entered this world of fighting she helped him…He told me he is not doing that anymore.”

They both looked at each other, knowing something that Elide didn’t know, and that made Elide confused.

“What?”

“Is she threatening him already?”

Elide’s heart stopped beating for a moment as she gathered her thoughts.

“Sort of.”

“It’s her M.O.” Dorian told both women. “She got someone to follow me back when i was in college, because of something my father didn’t want to make for her. I found out later on that he made a deal with her that costed him tons of money.”

Elide didn’t know if she should talk with them about Lorcan in detail, if she should talk about the fact that Maeve already have someone following her. That apparently she was important to Lorcan to the point where Maeve was torturing him when putting someone to follow her around and taking pictures.

“Well, he told me she is not working with her anymore and that’s it.” Elide got up from the couch when hearing the pizza bike’s sound from outside. “I’m going to grab the pizza.”

The questions for that night were finally over, and when Elide went to sleep she had the urge to send a message to Lorcan but decided it was best to just go to sleep. Let her dreams fill her mind and rest her mind.

**_*~*_ **

_Someone was grabbing her arms, pushing them and making her fall down some steps in the staircase. When she looked up, it was her uncle. He looked at her with utter disgust and hatred, making her insides tremble._

_While still sitting on the floor of an old house that once belonged to her parents, she tried to overcome the pain on her knees and got up. Some of the bruised were already turning purple while older one became yellowish. The man she called ‘uncle’ grabbed a book on the shelf next to him, she knew more pain would come._

_She was twelve and still small for her age due to not being fed properly by her guardian, so she was weaker than him...fragile. And he knew that. He knew that she wouldn’t be able to defend herself or even make other people believe what he was doing with her. Mostly because she never went outside. He had her always locked inside her small room, filled with nothing other than dust and a mattress on the floor._

_“If I ever catch you eavesdropping again...you little-”_

_And then the pain came. Over and over again, and when he left her bruised and laying on the ground of her bedroom, too weak to even seat properly, she knew he was done for the day. She knew it would take a week for him to snap at her and do it over again. Hit her with his big palms and angry heart, if he had a heart, obviously. She doubted that._

_Everyday she wondered what she have done to anger her uncle so much. Everyday she wondered if her parents did something to him. But she preferred not to think about that, she focused on the sun shining outside and on the ray of sunshine coming from under the closed window. She counted to ten everytime she thought she heard him coming towards her door. And everytime he continued down the corridor, she sighed relieved._

**_*~*_ **

She woke up to the sound of drops of rain on her window glass, Elide sat on the bed and touched her injured ankle that throbbed for some reason. Obviously, she knew that it was a consequence of her nightmare. Everytime those scenes from her past came back there was some consequences, and she hated knowing that she hasn’t moved on from those things.

But how could she do that? She was still trying to piece together the parts of her hearts that never went back to their original place, and she feared they would never be.

The clock showed the time, 7AM, it was too early to wake up and too late to to go back to sleep. She felt the need to going outside and lay down on the little space they have that they called back yard.

It was cold outside, she brought her cell phone with her just in case she wanted to listen to some music and in case she wanted to send a message to Lorcan.

She wanted to meet him. To ask him if he was indeed out of Maeve's claws, but she felt like that was way out of line. They weren't that close. They were casual friends, who worry about each other's well being.

 

_Can we talk?_

 

Three words. Words that meant something that he probably doesn't expect. She couldn't help herself and clicked ‘send’, now he had the power.

He should be asleep. Because when the clock reach the number ten he still hasn't answered, she was glad that he was still not knowing anything. That he was probably sleeping and enjoying retirement.

Dorian was reading the paper, something she never saw someone do before, and while he absorbed the words she started to prepare some tea for herself.

“Good morning, Dorian.”

“Hello, Elide. Slept well?”

She turned to the counter to pour the hot water on her mug.

“Yes...and how was the first night at your home?”

“Relaxing. Everything in my old apartment was too empty and too white. Here is homie.”

“Yes...Manon lives here for more time than me but these past two years were incredible.”

He placed his paper on the table and looked over me with thoughtful eyes.

“Don’t get involved with Maeve. I'm sure you are already but...for your sake. Stay away from her.”

“I'm not doing anything to make her angry, don't worry.”

His sigh was the ending marker of their conversation, so she went back to her tea. Her cell phone had a missing call notification but before she could click on the screen she heard someone knocking on her front door.

Dorian made a movement to get up from his seat but she held her hand up as if saying she got it and he can continue with his reading.

She was surprised to see Lorcan on the other side of the door. With his hands inside his jacket's pocket and looking as if he didn't slept well.

“You wanted to talk.”

“Oh, right. Just a second...come in.” She opened his door and hesitated when seeing Dorian sitting on the table. “Lorcan, this is Dorian, Manon's boyfriend.”

They both shook hands and then Lorcan stood waiting for Elide in the middle of the living room, like a statue. Dorian found it amusing but kept reading his newspaper, and Elide was in the bedroom getting her purse and some snickers. She tried to go quickly with her things but then Manon’s bedroom door opened and her roommate appeared, looking utterly lovely wearing a dress.

“What are you doing?” Elide caught Manon’s attention before she saw Lorcan a little worried that her friend was wearing something so bright and happy.

“I’m wearing something nice for my in-law to like me.”

“You do know that you...with this clothes...freaks me out.”

Manon noticed that Elide was carrying her purse and keys.

“And where you are going?” Manon then looked over at Dorian and noticed the familiar figure standing in the living room, with his shoulder-length hair and brooding. “Oh, I see...a date, huh?”

Elide just left her roommate talking alone and joined Lorcan, she smiled up at him and indicated the door. She suddenly didn’t want her friends to know Lorcan, awkward questions will surely be done.

“Let’s go.”

He didn’t have time to say goodbye to anyone, they were already outside. Elide had a firm grip on his arm while she walked fast to the corner of the street where she lived.

She breathed then. Letting out a long sigh while turning to see Lorcan. He had a strange little smile on the corner of his lips, amused by whatever he was seeing.

“Do you want to go to the coffee shop?” She tried to focus now on the things she wanted to talk about with him.

“Actually, I have something to do in a bit. Can we talk here?”

“Oh, sure.” She was a little disappointed with that. She wanted more time to sort out her mind before anything. “Look, it’s a silly question...I wanted to know if there is any way that Maeve would stop messing with you?”

Something in his eyes made Elide flinch. Lorcan looked at her as if she asked something funny, he must be laughing at this silly question but Elide didn’t think it was something to mock about it. He was the one that showed those pictures.

“I took care of it.” His expression became dark, suddenly turning everything to black and white. “I was going to tell you that today but then i saw your message...I thought-”

“You thought that she had done something to me.” He nodded, and then started to check his clock, he was busy as he said that day. “Now, that Maeve is out of the equation…” Lorcan’s eyes fixed on Elide’s face because she got a sweet tone in her voice, suddenly making him curious and nervous. “We could go on a date sometime.”

Without thinking, Lorcan took a step back, noticing how close they were standing in front of each other. her words were still being processed by his brain, and when he saw the reddened on her cheeks he knew how hard it was for her to say those words out loud.

“Sure. I need to go, but can I call you tomorrow?”

Elide nods, not wanting to make him late to whatever business he had.

He then came closer to her and caught her hand hesitantly, not used to delicate hands like hers and afraid that she would reject his calloused hand. Her eyes were watery, not of tears, but of turbulent emotions trying to get out of her. She wasn’t used to be touched this way, with so much care and so softly.

He took a step ahead, almost getting his body touching hers, and when he leaned down she looked up. Meeting him halfway, brushing her lips to his and appreciating the slowness of the moment. He smelled of mint and soap, probably due to his need of always taking a shower after working out and she had the urge to put her hands around his shoulders. But the kiss ended. Ended too soon in Elide’s opinion.

“Take care.”

“I will.” He did something unusual, he winked at her before turning around and walking to the end of the street, disappearing after a minute.

Elide could die of happiness, she wanted to jump and yell but she restrained herself after noticing there were a couple of people on the other side of the street walking on the sidewalk.

Her thoughts were disrupted by her cell phone ringing, she stopped walking towards her house and opened her bag. She thought for a moment that it was Lorcan but it was in fact Chaol. Why he would call her on a Sunday, she wasn’t sure.

_“Hey, Chaol, what-”_

_“Elide! Lorcan is going to fight this afternoon and it’s because of Maeve.”_

The noise was absurd behind Chaol’s voice but she understood completely. She now knew how Lorcan got Maeve to back off. He went back to her.


	7. Devil in Me

_ I won't take anyone down if I crawl tonight _

_ But I still let everyone down when I change in size _

_ And I went tumbling down tryna reach your high _

_ But I scream too loud if I speak my mind _

 

Elide didn’t stop to think things through.

When she put her cell phone away angrily, she knew where she should go. Her legs started to move without thinking twice, and while her feet throbbed she couldn’t stop. She ran to the bus station because it would take her almost in front of the Stadium and from there some minutes until she reached Lorcan.

She was so mad with him. After all the things she heard, after she knew the pain in his eyes, he still went back to Maeve. Deep down she knew it was to make her stop following Elide or mess with his life in general, but he should stop sacrificing himself. Especially if he is doing that because of Elide, they were friends for a short time, Lorcan couldn’t be that attached.

The bus is at the stop, so she runs even faster to reach it and when the driver is almost closing the doors, Elide pushes herself to fit the space that was left open. All the way to the Stadium, she kept thinking about Lorcan, about what he think he was doing. Why he went back to Maeve when she knew he hated. It couldn’t only be to make the woman stop following her.

Elide noticed that her cell phone was ringing but she decided to ignore, whoever it might be it wasn’t important at the moment. She looked over the window and saw the cars going faster than the bus, the people taking cover from the rain that was starting to fall outside. 

Her stop finally came, she pushed some people out of her way and saw that there were crowds in front of the Stadium, posters advertising the fight. They weren’t there the last time she was there so this fight must be something that came out of the blue. She didn’t see Chaol and she opted to go through the back door of the place to avoid anyone to stop her from doing whatever she was doing. She wasn’t sure what she was doing, actually. Elide only needed to talk with Lorcan, she wanted to understand his reasons and maybe persuade him to stop.

“Elide!” She turned and saw Chaol coming slowly towards her with a man holding his arms to help him not to fall due to his leg problem. “I’m not sure what to do...I don’t want-”

Elide put a hand on his shoulder, noticing how stoic the strange man was and how he looked angry at something.

“I will try to talk to him...I was just with him and he said something about having something to do...I didn’t know it would be this.” The man, with his short platinum hair, looked down at her and nodded in agreement to something. “Do you know where he is?”

“Probably warming up in the locker room.” The man next to Chaol said.

“Thank you…?”

“Rowan. Aelin’s husband.”

Her mind started to work and when she finally understood, Elide was shocked. Aelin was her distant cousin that they sometimes call each other to talk about life, and how Aelin was getting closer to rule the business world with her fierce heart. Last month when they talked, Aelin didn’t mentioned anything about getting married or even a boyfriend.

“I will call my dear cousin later. Because I never knew you existed.” Chaol was amused by that judging from his little smile creeping out of his mouth.

“I asked her not to talk about me. I was hiding from Maeve.”

“You were also...Maeve’s? Sorry, I don’t know…”

“I think it’s better for you to go talk to Lorcan. He can be stubborn.”

Her heart started to swell, she needed to understand what was happening. She kissed Chaol’s cheek’s and practically ran to the stairs. Lorcan should be in the lockers section of the basement area, normally that’s where people, teams and bands got ready to go to stage...or arena.

When she arrived at the basement, her foot was killing her, and the light were oddly bright, but she couldn’t stop. Not when she was so close to Lorcan, so close to put some sense into his mind.

She reached a corridor where the lights were brighter than the ones before, filled with doors on each side and that’s when she saw a woman with black hair walking towards Elide. The woman coming to her had a mocking look on her face and while she walked there was something dangerous about it. As if that woman could set everything on flames and she would still be unfazed by it.

“Elide Lochan. I can’t say I’m happy to see you, but it’s interesting.”

Her voice was cold. Almost freezing.

Elide tried to pass through her, but Maeve caught her arm almost breaking the skin with her long nails.

“Lorcan is busy now, Elide. You should leave.”

“I don’t know what is going on and I want to talk to him.”

She tried to pass Maeve but the silvery hair woman caught her upper arm almost bruising her skin. They both stared at each other, Elide not so sure about what to do but then she didn’t need to because Lorcan emerged from one of the door behind Maeve.

His hair was tight in a bun, and even though no exercise was made he was already sweating. He looked focused and deadly, but then his eyes turned towards Elide and something in him clicked. 

His expression showed that he was ashamed of being caught doing this, but then putting his chin up he walked towards them. Gently pushing Maeve away from Elide.

“Maeve, I need one minute.” He said before moving Elide to the door he emerged from.

“Whatever, you know the deal.” Her heels clicked on the concrete while she walked away from them. 

There was a moment where both of them just stared at each other, not wanting to break eye contact and not wanting to ruin the silence. But reality came crashing when Elide finally spoke.

“Why?”

“I owe this to her.”

“You don’t own her nothing...if this is because of those pictures-Lorcan, I don’t care the reason, just stop this.”

He looked down, almost defeated, but she couldn’t let him do that. Hurt himself over and over again doing something she knew he wasn’t happy while doing it.

“I have to do this, Elide. It’s not about what I want anymore.”

“This is so stupid! I don’t want to see you get hurt!” Her hands went to her hair, her frustration was getting the best of her and she was almost punching Lorcan. She knew her hands will get hurt if she tried that so she stayed put. “I can’t stay here. I can’t see you fighting.”

Her hands went to his face, gently and slow, she caressed the smoot skin of his face and then let go.

“I need to go.”

With that she turned around and walked slowly through the same path she took to get there, feeling her feet throbbing because of all the walking from before. The blood was rushing through her head and she couldn’t think straight...she told him she wouldn't stay to watch him fight but a part of her was curious. Curiosity was a beast, and she couldn’t kneel to it, she wouldn't let get the best of her. Other emotions were already doing that.

Elide saw Chaol waving at her from one of the seats near the exit of the arena area, and although she wanted to stop and talk to him to help her get Lorcan out somehow, she knew there was nothing she could do.

Loud music and loud people all around her, but she focused on the exit. She focused on getting out, and even when she heard Lorcan’s name being called to the arena she didn't stop. But then she fell, not on the floor because someone grabbed her arm before both her knee were touching the floor.

“Thank you-Oh, you.”

Rowan let her go when she was standing up properly, and she unwillingly saw Lorcan going up to the arena meters away. She was not even listening to her cousin's husband anymore, she was not even sure if he was saying anything. But that didn’t matter, not when she saw the first punch being thrown.

“At the beginning I thought she was some kind of witch, she knew how to read people and give them what they want. She always knew how to make us feel happy...that’s what gives her power. And that’s what ruins us…” Rowan was talking to Elide now. Her focus went to him. “We believed on everything...and then when she drains us...that’s when we are able to see that everything she did was a curse.”

Elide hated Maeve. Hated her, even thinking about her mocking grin when she stopped Elide to see Lorcan minutes before was making Elide angry.

“Why she does that? Why she uses people and hurt them?”

“To quote my beautiful wife ‘She is completely insane and a bitch’. Which is totally correct...Elide, I don’t know you. I only know some stories that Aelin told me, but I know you are someone strong and determined.” He smiled weakly at Elide, his smile showed pain and regret. “But I know Lorcan. Lorcan can be moody and angry most of the times, but he has a good heart. Chaol told me you guys are close, so hear me out…Stay with him. If you still like him, stay. Even if you are angry with him.”

“I didn’t know you two knew each other so well.” The tears that were trying to get out of her eyes were making it difficult to see Rowan clearly in front of her, so she pressed the back of her palms over her eyes and tried to recompose herself. “I wish I could stay...but-I don’t want to be in this mess.”

“Alright. It’s ok, Elide. I’m not trying to make you do something you don’t want to. I’m just saying…”

She didn’t want to stay there anymore, she wanted to run. Of course, she couldn't. Because when she tried to get out of her mess, she got hurt badly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay!
> 
> Hope you all enjoy this chapter, more of a transitioning chapter that sets the mood for what's gonna happen next!


	8. Now or Never

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, everyone!!
> 
> I'm so sorry about this delay! But here is a brand new chapter (more a transition chapter but hopefully you guys will like). 
> 
> The story is coming to its last chapters (two or more and they are BIG)! 
> 
> Thanks for those who kept reading the fic and welcome to new readers!
> 
> Have a nice weekend, everyone!

 

 

_ I'm turnin' off the light right now _

_ I'm callin' it a night now _

_ Wishin' you were 'round with me _

_ But you're in a different town than me _

 

When Elide got home, it was to find the whole house with its lights off and some muffled voices coming from Manon’s bedroom. She went to her room, fighting the tears that were already coming down her face, fighting the sadness that was trying to get out of her chest.

She turned around her bed, not being able to go to sleep, not being able to relax. Knowing that Lorcan is fighting or wondering how much Lorcan is hurt.

Her cell phone started to ring, but she didn’t want to see who it was, or she even cared. She was tired, tired of having to deal with so many bad things and never having a break. Tired of caring for Lorcan, someone who clearly is destructive to himself and probably not a good idea to be tangled with. And Elide knew that from the beginning, because Chaol and Yrene told her what a mess his life was. Mostly because of Maeve.

She was tired.

After a long sleepless week, where she went to work almost like a zumbi and tried to avoid Chaol at all costs, she decided to do something that was probably going to make Manon go insane with her.

“You what?” Her roommate yelled in the middle of their dinner, making her boyfriend reach out for her hand as a way to stop her for making things more difficult. “If this is about Dorian I can throw him out of here.”

“What? “ Dorian looked surprised and a little bit hurt.

“Princeling, Elide is a priority. Sorry but you know that.”

Elide surpassed a smile that was fighting to get free.

“I’m not moving out. I just want to take some time of...of everything.”

“Dorian, go to our room.”

Elide always found it amusing the way Dorian followed Manon blindly, not in a unhealthy way, but he respected her opinion and always gave her space.

When they were alone, her and Manon stared at each other. For long seconds they stayed in silence until Manon sighed.

“Look, Elide, I know you’ve been sad...and I know why because I went to talk to Chaol. But girl, crying over a man you barely know...not worth it.” Elide held her breath. “You are a smart woman. You don’t need trash in your life...you already have to deal with the memories of your uncle…”

“Manon, I don’t-”

“Just hear me out.”

Elide decided to hear what her roomate had to say. She notice the way Manon seemed to have a mind battle inside her head, so she let her friend rant.

“I know that this...Lorcan, must be a good guy deep down. But you need a true good guy. Someone who isn’t tangled with Maeve, for crying out loud!” She hit the table with force, making Elide jump a little on her seat. “Ok, maybe you want to travel just to clear your mind, but I don’t think running away from everything will made things better, Eli.”

She holds Elide’s hand, making Elide shiver because she didn’t want to make Manon sad. She just wanted some time away.

“Do you honestly think going to the countryside for two weeks will get you peace of mind?”

Manon was asking truly, showing Elide she would that even if didn’t like it, she would accept whatever Elide decided.

“I don’t know...I just-” Elide looked down at their hands, feeling overwhelmed by how much Manon cared. “I wish Lorcan would explain to me. What he was thinking when he went back to Maeve...I just wish we had more time to get to know each other before everything completely ended. Geez, we kissed for the first time the same day everything fell apart…”

“Do you want me to punch him? I could, you know.”

Elide laughed, between some tears that escaped from her eyes and feeling somehow relieved. Somehow she didn’t want to go away anymore, she wanted to stay with her friend and try to get over her feelings for Lorcan. It’s not as if it was such deep emotions, they barely had a relationship. It was just a glimpse of it, a great glimpse and Elide would have to deal with the fact.

After Dorian came back to the kitchen, they decided to go for a picnic at the park to take advantage of the sunny day. Dorian kept talking about how Manon doesn’t have a clue about laundry and asking Elide how his girlfriend survived before without knowing where to put hot water and where to put cold water. Elide liked seeing Manon so happy, she liked to think that life was giving her friend a chance to find real love after so many trash boyfriends.

Elide liked to think that her time will arrive. That she will find someone that leans to the side so he can place a kiss at the side of her head while looking at her with adoring eyes.

She decided to call Chaol and Yrene, it was time to stop avoiding them.

  
  


*

 

“Yrene is bringing the hot dogs...where is Manon and Dorian?”   
Chaol walked with his klutches and sat near the picnic table they were placing their food.

“They went to buy something to drink...Want some salad?”

Elide sat next to him, a little bit nervous that he would bring the feared subject on the table and especially while they are alone. Fortunately, he stayed focused on the salad he was serving himself and they talked about work and how their boss is going to fire a guy from the reception.

“Maybe you could try for the job...they pay more, right?” Elide asked.

“Yeah, but I like to move around. And Yrene says is better to do something where I will move a lot...atrophy is not good looking, she says.”

Elide smiled, and then thought that maybe she should apply. Her foot works just fine but sometimes he aches if used a lot, also the paycheck was better according to the information she heard from HR.

The idea of going was slowly fading from her mind, she was happy around her friends, even fi a little bit tense too. Dorian and Manon arrived shortly after, with their hairs are messed up and looking incredible guilty...at least, Dorian was. Manon was her usual self.

Yrene brought soda and beers with a mini fridge and they all sat while enjoying the food and drinks. Manon kept bugging Yrene that she should cut her hair short and have a baby with Chaol soon, and while Elide and the rest laughed at that idea, Chaol tensed and had a dark expression on his face.

Elide noticing the residual tension still in the midst, decided to help Yrene carry the fridge back to her car while the rest stayed behind to organize. It was almost nighttime, they overdid their time there and it was starting to get chilly.

“Is Chaol angry with what Manon said? She can be a little intrusive…”

Yrene sighed when closing the car door.

“It’s not that per se...Chaol says he doesn't want kids, he thinks he can’t be a good father while being handicapped, which is something horrible to say but Chaol loves to think he is a failure.”

She messed with some curls of her hair, and then Elide said with all the feelings she could.

“I’m sorry...I always thought you guys would be great parents. Maybe he will see that soon.”

“I hope so...He is the love of my life and I want to have his kids someday.”

Yrene put a strong expression on her face, but tears were starting to form on the corner of her eyes, and it pained Elide to see her friend sad.

     "I would like to see you smile more too, Elide. I know things are...not ideal. But you barely knew him and there are plenty of guys out there that are less complicated."

  She  wasn't to talk about Lorcan yet. She appreciated Yrene's intention, but she just pressed her lips together and nodded while turning her back to her friend. She wasn't ready. And she was mad with herself because of that, because of how everything in her life seemed to have stop moving since Lorcan's fight.

     Still, she knew she needed to see him one more time before crushing these feelings inside of her.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi guys!!
> 
> I love Elorcan so much that I needed to write something about them.
> 
> All the characters belong to Sarah J Mass and the Throne of Glass series.
> 
> Hope you all enjoy.
> 
> PS: English is not my first language, sorry if I made some grammar mistakes <3


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